When a relationship is over, it’s normal to experience a ‘grieving’ period. But for some people, this phase stretches so long that they are simply unable to move on from a past relationship. If you find that you can’t get over an ex, it may be due to any one of these six reasons.
1. You’re still in contact with them
To allow your heart to heal, you have to cut off all contact when the relationship is over. And yes, this includes blocking them on social media. You cannot move on if you spend time checking out their profile, status, whose post they commented on, etc. This is because you will find yourself constantly reacting to what they say or do. It’s like continuing to reopen a wound that’s yet to heal.
2. You’re hoping to reconcile
Many people who can’t get over an ex have difficulties because deep down, they are hoping they will get back together. You just have to keep reminding your brain that it’s over until your heart eventually catches up.
3. You forget why you broke up
Conveniently, you only think about the good times. You completely skip the part where it ended and why. This is not a realistic way to look at things.
4. You’re trying to rush the process
You can’t get over an ex if you rush through the process. Don’t jump into a new relationship immediately or start dating while broken-hearted. Those feelings you are trying to bury will come rushing back at an inconvenient moment.
5. You put him on a pedestal
He’s not perfect, so stop thinking of him as if he is. Putting someone on a pedestal will mean that you will compare everyone to the ideals you’ve bestowed on him. Since no one will compare (because of course, there’s no such thing as a perfect human) you will find yourself struggling to move on.
6. You’re wallowing
It’s okay to be sad after a breakup, but don’t wallow and . the victim for months on end. Go out, meet friends, keep busy, do something fun, whatever puts a smile on your face. This is the only way to take your mind off an ex.
It can be hard when you can’t get over an ex. But keep reminding yourself that it’s healthy to move on. And someday, you’ll be happier for it.
Here’s what to do after a breakup if you want to move on quickly.