People say things like “he’s my lover and my best friend,” but should this be a standard for every relationship? Is it insane to have your significant other and your best friend to be two different people?
The truth is, your partner and your best friend offer different types of emotional benefits and connection. Your best friend, for example, is the person you share common interests with, who you can talk to about anything and everything.
Yes, it’s possible to be in a relationship where your partner is your best friend. For this to actually work out, you should both have a lot on common and be there for each other no matter what. You can tell him anything without worrying about being judged. It’s also important that you’re yourself around him.
However, it’s healthier and more appropriate to have an additional friend (or more). There will be times you’ll butt heads with your partner and when there’s friction, you should have someone other than your significant other to support you and keep you sane. Otherwise, you risk feeling lonely when things aren’t good between the both of you.
When he’s not your bestie
While you and your partner should have a certain level of friendship to make things work, it’s okay if you don’t consider him your best friend. Perhaps you have some interests he doesn’t share or you both have a different idea of what a perfect Saturday evening looks like. That’s okay. As long as you can both meet each other’s basic emotional needs, you should be able to cultivate good friendships outside of your relationship without threatening it.
Should your lover be your best friend?
At the end of the day, every couple is different, each with their own needs. So there’s no simple answer here. However, it isn’t a healthy idea for your man to be your ‘only’ friend, though. That’s a LOT of pressure to put on one person.
While on the topic, find out if your girlfriends are destroying your relationship.